A Pocket Full of Coins

Dear Theophilous,

I used to be like pretty much everybody else. Whenever we would venture into downtown Toronto, I’d be on the lookout; making wide detours when needed; directing my son’s attention the other way.

Then something changed. I can really pinpoint a moment in time when it happened. It was more of a gradual process than an Epiphany experience. But somewhere along the line, my heart softened. I began to see the homeless as human, created in the image of God, and deserving of the dignity that entails.

I had often heard the old argument for not giving money to the homeless: They’ll just use it on drugs. But then I began to wonder, what if a few coins were all they had to get a meal for the day, or week even. I realized I could no longer ignore these poor souls.

My new resolution to do something firmly in mind made for an awkward encounter our next trip into the big city. Seeing a homeless man ahead, his up-turned hat on the sidewalk, I was ready to make good on my promise to help out, even if it was to be only a few small coins. Hand fumbling through my pocket, I soon realized that in our cashless society, I had nothing in my wallet but plastic and large bills. Sheepishly I walked by, avoiding eye contact as I had done so many times before.

I learned my lesson. Now I go prepared. Before any excursion into the city, whether it’s for a sporting event or dinner out, I pillage our spare change jar, making sure I have at least $10 to $20 in coins in my pocket - $1 to $2 for each person we might come across in our travels.

I will do this when we’re going out as a family, or if I’m heading to a sporting event as a friend. While others will circle around the homeless sitting on the sidewalk, I will walk by, dropping a couple coins in their hat or cup, look them in the eye and give them a short “God bless.”

The reaction I have gotten has ranged from silence to a mumbled “God bless you too.” To a thankful 6pm: “You’re the first one today.”

The reactions of friends and family have been initial fear and embarrassment, which slowly give way to a certain humbleness. My son will now even look for these opportunities when we foray into the city.

Still, I understand that some people are remain leery about giving cash to the homeless (no matter how small the amount). My brother-in-law and his family have found a great way around this quandary. Every so often they will descend into the heart of downtown with a mission in mind. They will buy a dozen or so hamburgers from a local fast-food chain (nothing fancy, just a simple burger) and hand those out to the people they come across on the street. A beautiful gesture that will fill a belly, at least for a day.

**Addendum**

Just last week we went to a junior hockey game in the town next to ours. We were with a service group that my son belongs to, so to give him his independence I passed him $20 and sat a few rows away. Throughout the game I watched him come and go, laughing with his friends; and as we walked out after the final buzzer his grin told me he had had a fantastic time. Making our way along the cold snowy streets to our car, he spotted a homeless man sitting on the corner, cup in hand, ignored by the throngs leaving the arena. Silently, without any prompting my son let his hand slip from mine and he walked over, digging the change out of his pocket to drop in the poor man’s cup.

A Morning Family Prayer of Blessing

Dear Theophilous,

As a Christian father, I am called to help get my wife and son to heaven. This is my primary vocation in life. Everything else is secondary.

When asked to give a list of priorities, I always answer this in this order:

1.     God

2.     Wife

3.     Son

4.     Family

5.     Friends

6.     Self

7.     Work

Yes, my wife will always come before my son, because without her, he wouldn’t have a mother; and I love him too much to see him go through life without his mother. Also, she is the one God created to compliment and complete me even before I was conceived in my own mother’s womb. God has a plan for us together, and that plan is to bring our son closer to Him.

Over more than 20 years, this vocation to my family has developed and strengthened through prayer and discernment to involve many different aspects. Through the years I have heard God call me to lead my family to frequent the sacrament of Reconciliation, to go to Eucharistic Adoration, and to go on vocation vacations – visiting the tombs of St. Jean de Brébeuf and St. André de Montréal at the Oratoire St. Joseph.

One practice that has emerged in the past two years has been morning benediction. Every morning it begins when in the tumult of each of us getting ready to start our day I’ll call out, “Daddy’s coming for benediction in 2 minutes.” Then a moment later I will walk into the family room, a drop of Holy Water in the palm of my hand, to find my son, breakfast try on his lap, and my wife on the sofa, the two dogs sitting at their sides.

Dipping my thumb in the Holy Water, I will trace the Cross on each of their foreheads, calling them each by name, saying, “Michael, may the Lord bless you and keep you.” Once the family has been blessed, my son in turn dips his thumb in the Holy Water and traces a Cross on my forehead, “Daddy, may the Lord bless you and keep you.”

Then I lead the family in prayer:

Lord,

Thank You for the gift of this new day,

For the sun that is shining / the rain that is falling.

We thank You for the love that we share as a family,
and for our furry family members.

We thank You for our Guardian Angels,

May they forever watch over us, guide us and protect us.

We thank You for (here I will list prayers that have been answered),

And we ask that You might (here I will list any intentions we continue to pray for).

We ask, Lord, that You send Your Holy Spirit upon us,

That we might meet the challenges of this day with grace, courage and wisdom,

That we may bring others closer to You through Your Son,

In whose name we pray.

Amen

St. Michael the Archangel,

Defend us in battle,

Be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil,

May God rebuke him, we humbly pray,

And you, O Prince of the heavenly host,

By the power of God,

Thrust into hell Satan,

And all the evil spirits who prowl about the world,

Seeking the ruin of souls.

Amen

Now let us go forth to love and serve the Lord.

Thanks be to God.

Then, after our individual days are done, when we meet back again at the dinner table we will begin our Grace Before Meals with…

Lord,

Thank you for the Love we share as a family,

And for bringing us all home safely,

We thank you for this food …

Why Be Catholic?

Dear Theophilous,

I’m what most people would consider a cradle Catholic, more or less. Shortly after I was born I was baptized at St. Anselm’s parish in Toronto. Even though it wasn’t their home parish, they had gotten married there, and thus the decision to have me baptized there. I don’t think any of us have ever been back to St. Anselm’s since.

I also have vague recollections of my sister’s baptism when I was 3, but most of my early childhood memories are of Sunday School at the local United Church. It wasn’t until I was 9 years-old and my mom went through the RCIA program that we started attending St. John Chrysostom and I made my first Reconciliation and Eucharist. From that point on, for all intents and purposes, was raised a cradle Catholic.

During those formative years, if you had asked me Why I was Catholic, I would have given the question about a 10-second thought before answering, “Because my parents are.” Actually, growing up in the Catholic school system, it just seemed natural that everybody and their parents (and their parents’ parents) were Catholic. It was just the natural order of things.

As I’ve been mellowing in my old age, however, I’ve been giving more and more thought to the question Why be Catholic? It’s a question I’ve heard discussed by a variety of different personalities on The Catholic Channel on SiriusXM, giving much food for thought. It’s a question I knew I had to answer once I saw it emblazoned on a banner in my mother-in-law’s parish in London, Ontario.

I know the answer, “Because my parents are,” will no longer hold water when it comes to defending my Catholic faith, so I narrowed it down to three key reasons:

• The Eucharist
• The Truth
• My Family

The Eucharist

The Catechism of the Catholic Church rightly states that “The Eucharist is the source and summit of Christian life.” (CCC #1324) The Catechism tells us how all other sacraments, and all other life in the Church are bound up in the Eucharist and oriented toward it. How could they not be? This is the body and blood, soul and divinity of our Lord and Saviour. Really, the Eucharist is the be all and end all of what it means to be Catholic, and in my mind, what it means to be Christian.

Believing in the Eucharist isn’t easy. It never was. Even those who knew Christ and followed him daily had a hard time. During the Eucharistic Discourse in the Gospel according to St. John, when Jesus tells His followers they need to eat His flesh and drink His blood they grumble, “This is a hard saying; who can listen to it?” (Jn 6:60) And then when Jesus reiterated our need for the Eucharist, “many drew back and no longer walked with Him.” (Jn 6:66).

Knowing the Eucharist, understanding the Eucharist, loving the Eucharist; none of it is easy; but one you do, it is the most beautiful thing on Earth. I’ve heard it said that if we truly knew in our hearts what the Eucharist contained – wild horses could not keep us away from it. Some of the most profound moments in my life have come before the Blessed Sacrament, my heart physically pulled towards the Tabernacle; the ache of my suffering eased by the sacrifice on the altar; the tranquil warmth that fills me when I consume the Eucharist.

It is through the Eucharist that I love that I have come to know Christ’s love for me, a sinner.

The Truth

If the Eucharist is the source and summit of our faith, our faith hinges on a single question that Jesus asks us: “Who do you say that I am?” (Mk 8:29, Mt 16:15) How we answer that question changes everything. C.S. Lewis tells us we can answer this question in only in one of three ways: that Christ a liar, a lunatic, or He is Lord. Personally, I pick the third option each and every time.

Whenever defending doctrine or explaining a point of faith, I like to begin the discussion by asking this very question. The starting point with Christians is that He is Lord, God, one with the Father and the Holy Spirit. (If this isn’t the answer, there’s a whole other conversation that needs to take place). If Christ is God, then we have to take what He says as the Truth – like it or not.

Christ Himself tells us, “I am the way, the truth and the life.” (Jn 14:6) It’s not a boast – it’s a simple fact.

There are a lot of Christ’s teachings that are difficult, even more so now in the 21^st Century than they were in the 1^st Century (and look what they did to Jesus back then). When we propose that our truths are better than Christ’s, are we then not presupposing that we are greater than God?

The Truth that Christ gives us in His Gospel is like a beacon in the dark. The Truth guides us to the joy of eternal life in Him. The seas may be, and usually are, rough; but the guiding light of Christ’s love and Truth bring us to safety. Instead of binding us up, the Truth liberates us to not worry about the raging waters around us, but to take comfort in the safe harbour we are going to enter.

My Family

The joy of faith is not something to be kept in secret, a lamp hidden under a bushel basket; rather, it is to be shared freely. I love the expression: Don’t just keep the faith. Give it away!

I always teach my students that the true meaning of Love is “to want what is best for the other.” If I truly love my wife and if I truly love my son, how could I ever imagine to keep from them the beauty I have found in the Eucharist and the Truth? There is nothing I want more for them than the love of God.

This is how the faith has come down to us over 2,000 years. Passed from generation to generation, parent to child. I can’t think of any better gift I could give my son, a gift that will not only last a lifetime, but for all eternity.

Why Be Catholic? Is a question I had never given too much thought to, but it’s a question which defines who I am; who my family is.  This is a question I no longer run from, but embrace and am proud to answer.

Live - Life - Sacrifice



 

Dear Theophilus,

When our parish catechist, Patrick Sullivan, starts the parent information meeting for the sacramental preparation courses (Reconciliation, Eucharist and Confirmation) he always begins with the line: “Children love what their parents love!” Personally, I couldn’t agree more, and this probably explains why my son loves the Montreal Canadiens (even though we live near to Toronto), playing soccer (which he properly calls: football), and why he dotes on his mother. He emulates the love that he sees.

It should have come as no surprise then that this summer at the age of 10 he decided he wanted to write a blog. He would have spent the better part of two months watching daddy frantically pound away at the keyboard, working away on multiple projects. It should also come as no surprise that the focus of Michael’s blog is the Catholic faith.

Mike has called his blog Live– Life – Sacrifice. When I asked him why, he just shrugged his shoulders, said he had never thought about it, but I guess to him, it just sounds right. So far he’s only written two blog posts, both of which plumb the depths of some pretty deep theological questions: the Trinity and Heaven’s existence.

I’m always amazed at how profound this guy’s thought process is. I think sometimes we sell our kids short; they understand way more than we think they do, and their faith has yet to be tarnished by the devils of this earthly world.

Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. (Mt 18:3)

Please stop by from time to time to see what wisdom this young mind has to share with us, and remember, whether you are a parent, Godparent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, friend or teacher – children are watching you, and Children love what their parents love.

And also remember to:

Live – Life – Sacrifice